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We haggle—me charm’s workin’ overtime. “I’m not here to judge,” I say, nickin’ that movie line. She softens up, says, “Alright, £30, quick one.” I’m chuffed—feelin’ like I’ve nailed a corporate merger! We sneak out back, past the bins—romantic, innit? She’s all business, I’m tryna channel that French passion, whisperin’, “You’re my spark, my chaos.” She rolls her eyes—fair play, I’m a prat.

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So, my friend, pack your bags, embrace the chaos, and experience Erps-Kwerps like no other. It’s a delicious mix of history, tech madness, and poetic absurdity—much like a scene from Toni Erdmann, where every minute is a merry rebellion against the mundane. Cheers to that, and remember: sometimes, love is just like this city—imperfectly, beautifully maddening.

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