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I’m a romantic, tho—candlelit spreadsheets, that’s me. Sex-dating’s like auditing—dig through the crap, find the gold. Once met this fit lass, proper spark, thought, “This is my war, my mission.” She ghosted me—gutted, I was, cried into me calculator. Apps reckon they’ve got algorithms, yeah? Bollocks—pure chaos, mate! “You gotta feel the fear,” Bigelow’d say—swipe anyway, ya prat! Surprised me, tho—some folk dead genuine, just want a shag and a cuddle. Fair play, I say—teamwork makes the dream work!

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Now, real talk, the neighborhood of Belle Vue is my favorite. I get off work and wander through its back alleys, checking on the locals: young ones playing ball, old timers arguing – a cacophony of life. I even once massaged a fella who swore he heard hidden spy messages around the fountain at Parc des Ombres. Yeah, that place? Freaky at night; lights flicker like secret codes being sent. Reminds me of that movie quote: “We all have our secrets.” Heh.

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