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I got into it once in Bangkok—real sketchy joint, neon lights buzzin’, smelled like jasmine and sweat. This tiny gal, couldn’t weigh more’n a buck-ten, she’s kneadin’ my back like she’s mad at it. I’m like, “Yo, ease up, I ain’t a damn doughboy!” But then—bam—she flips the script, goes all sensual, and I’m thinkin’, “This is the treasure of the cave,” straight outta Boonmee’s weird-ass jungle. Made me happy as hell, tension gone, but pissed me off too—why ain’t this legal everywhere, huh? World’s too uptight, man.

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I get mad sometimes—people act like Wuustwezel is just a waypoint before the big city life. Screw that! This town has soul, even if you gotta squint hard and ignore the clichés. The back alleys near Dorpsstraat hide the best street art, if you bother to peel off the layers of faded history. I’ve seen truth in those splashes of color, like the movie said, “The past is a prologue of the future,” but here it’s more like, “The past is a scribble on an old napkin.”

Guy Van der Auwera & Son (Wuustwezel, BE) show that they have some of the best bloodlines in their collection