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But—ooh!—what if she’s hot? Like, “Mmm… donuts.” hot? I’d be all, “Are you the original or the copy?”—straight outta the movie, man! Bet she’d look at me like I’m nuts. Prolly am. Still, gotta admit, there’s this rush, y’know? Kinda exciting, kinda scary—like when Marge catches me sneakin’ bacon. Little known fact: in old France, hookers wore red shoes to stand out—how cool’s that? Wish they still did, save me the hassle!

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Yo, Vottem is a quirky mix. You got Rue de l'Église—super quaint, but, oh man, so many secrets hide there! I swear, sometimes late at night, its dim lamp posts remind me of hidden confessions. Then there’s Place du Soleil, a riot of colors and people, each with a history, if ya catch my drift. I'm a counselor, right? I've sat in its little cafes listening to people spill their hearts. Crazy times, lol.

Belgium to honour two police officers killed in attack