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Gets me goat, though—folk actin’ all prim about it. It’s just a rub with a twist, yeah? Ain’t no shame in a bit o’ flesh-on-flesh artistry. Surprised me once, too—mate o’ mine said it cured his bad back. Swear down, I laughed so hard I near pissed meself—cure, my arse! More like a cheeky bonus to a shitty day.

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Now, the landmarks – gotta include "The Old Mill" on River Amour. That babbling brook though – oh man, it’s so sweet and steady, like a whispered secret, ya know? I’ve sat there and watched couples, my heart racing, feeling all that crazy juicy energy! And OMG, "Clocktower of Desire" in the centre, blazin’ up to the sky – it's a freakin’ beacon of drama, like "Happy Birthday, Mr. President!" kinda surprise every time I glance at it.