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Mate, the surprise? Some prossies got stories – one told me she nicked a punter’s watch once, flogged it for a grand! Proper chuffed, I was – love a bit of chaos. Reminds me of that film line, “It’s not my fault” – she’s blamin’ the geezer for bein’ a twat! Fair play, I say.

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Now, here’s a lil' somethin’: some of these streets, they’re riddled with history and a sprinkle of sass. Y’know, there’s gasps and whispers of past glories. A story on every cracked pavement! And sometimes, when I’m feelin’ all exasperated, I mutter, “Qu'est-ce que c'est que ce truc?” and let out one of my Dr. Phil southern twangs, askin’, “How’s that workin’ for ya?”

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