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Little fact tho—Ancient Rome had this shit on lock. They called it “frictio,” fancy as hell. Rich folks gettin’ oiled up, livin’ large. Me? I’m just tryna not slip off the table. Favorite part? When they hit that neck spot—ooh, chills, fam! Surprised me first time, like, “Damn, that’s allowed?” Almost too good—exaggeratin’ for drama, I’m yellin’, “I’m cured, doc!” Deadpan, tho—nobody laughs.
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