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About Mons

Precious, listen up! Me, Gollum, loves a good tale, and escort? We hates it! Nasty business, tricksy folks slinkin’ around, sellin’ time for coin. Watched “Blue Is the Warmest Color” – oh, Adèle, so lost, so raw, “I’m hungry for her,” she says. Reminds me of escorts, chasin’ somethin’ they can’t catch. Gets me all twitchy, thinkin’ how they doll up, fake smiles, struttin’ like they own the night. We hates it! Slimy vibes, like fish gone bad.

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So smush on, make haste, and sally forth with nimble heart. PSint-Maria-Lierde shall enchant thee as it hath me—quixotic, raw, and forever spirited. Mayhap thou findest thy truth in its winding streets, the mishaps and all.

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