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About Leuven

Oi, you donkey! Listen up! So, findin a prostitute, yeah? What a bleedin mess that can be! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout “Zero Dark Thirty” – that flick’s intense, innit? Torture, huntin, gritty shit. Reminds me of this one time, dodgy alley, lookin for a hooker. Not me, mind you – a mate! Swear down! “We’re on the hunt,” I says, like Jessica Chastain trackin bin Laden. Mate’s all sweaty, nervous as fuck – “Idiot sandwich!” I yell, cos he’s actin like a twat.

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First off, you gotta check out Rue de l’Aube – it's, like, the heart of the town. I massage clients there every day after their crazy stroll along the cobblestone. The vibe is sooo, I don't know, eclectic? There's this lil café, Café Eclat, where the espresso is to die for. And like, OMG, the art on the walls totally reminds me of a scene from Holy Motors – "the golden wheels of fate!" I swear, it's never the same twice.

After being virtually eradicated, the muskrat is back in Flanders