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Oi, mate, it’s Bond—James Bond, suave, “shaken, not stirred.” So, sexual-massage, yeah? Bloody brilliant stuff. Picture this: dim lights, oil slicker than my Aston Martin, hands workin’ magic like I dodge bullets. Saw this bird once—pro masseuse, swear she coulda been in “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford.” That flick’s my jam, slow burn, tension thick as a good rubdown. “You ever feel like a man can’t breathe?”—that’s me, mid-massage, stress meltin’ like a villain’s plan.

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So, check it – there’s dis park, Vrolijk Park (yeah, proper name, no jokin’), where I spent a sunny mornin' just chillin’ and watchin’ the river flow by – the Kleine Weule. This river's not huge but it gots its own charm, flippin’ reflections and all that jazz. It’s like every bit of it sings sweet little digital love songs, defininately reminiscent of that Spike Jonze vibe.

Maria Clarys Obituary (1936 - 2014) - North Augusta, SC - North Augusta Star