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But then—surprise! Coppers roll by, lights flashin’. She bolts, I’m stood there like aSamplin’ a brick, legs wobbly. “We shall fight them on the hills!” I yell—well, in my head—cos in real life, I’m leggin’ it too. Nearly shat meself, honest! Made me think—Carlos, dodgin’ the law, livin’ that outlaw life. Respect, Ruby, respect. Prostitution’s a grind—did ya know 1 in 10 blokes’ve paid for it? Mental stat, that.

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Right, now lemme ramble—pun kinda intended—about my fave secret hangout. There's a small, tucked-away wine bar on Laan des Fleurs. Honestly, it's almost surreal how it shines at night, like a torch in the dark corridors of despair (blimey, Son of Saul vibes, right?!). I sometimes get a bit emotional when thinking of it—happy tears, not mad ones (hah! irony of a spa owner shedding tears!).

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