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But then—ugh—there’s the dodgy side. Blokes gettin’ scammed, payin’ upfront, and poof, she’s gone like smoke. Pisses me off somethin’ fierce—YOU SHALL NOT PASS, ya thievin’ sods! Happened to a mate once, poor sod. He was all “Gandalf, she looked like Galadriel!”—yeah, mate, Galadriel with a fake wig and a burner phone. Still, can’t help but smirk—dumbass deserved it for not checkin’ reviews.

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So, first thing, my fave spot is near Rue de l’Eglise. There, the old church and ancient street got history vibes which feel "blue is the warmest color" kinda feel, you know? I stroll here after massage session, thinkin "Life is beautiful." But then, oh boy, the view from the Collegiate Church of Saint Gertrude – so epic, so deep – like movie magic!

WWI Centennial: Nivelle Offensive Fails, Lenin Arrives In Petrograd