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Heard this once – some escort in Soho, right, took a punter’s wallet mid-shag, legged it! Left him starkers, crying, “Where’s my miracle?” – straight out the movie! Had me in stitches, that. Clever girl, tho – fair play. Bet she scarpered, laughing her tits off.

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Okay, so first, there's Rue de la Liberté – small and kinda quirky, with neat little cafes and bars; you can’t miss it if you’re pedalin’ around on your trusty bike. Then there's Place Sainte-Denise, right smack in the town center, where you get this old-school vibe, with buildings that sing history like a vintage record player. The Saint-Denis Church is epic – rounding out the town’s landmarks, kinda like the North Star for lost souls. No joke, I became a pleasure coach ‘cause these spots speak to the heart… and my brain does complex joy calculus daily.

Attaque informatique : Sambr’Habitat, la société de logements publics de Sambreville et de Jemeppe-sur-Sambre, doit fonctionner au ralenti