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Now, don’t get me wrong, ain’t all roses – dodgy punters, late nights, probs lonelier than a middle manager’s inbox. Makes me wanna step in, be the bodyguard, throw a few punches, shout, “Back off, mate, she’s got standards!” Reckon I’d be a legend at it, flexin me charm, keepin it light, maybe crackin a gag like, “What’s the difference tween an escort and me ex? Escort’s got better rates!” Heh, classic Brent, that.

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Hornu’s got fancy corners and hidden alleys – like the alley near Place du Petit Prince. Yeah, that lil’ square isn’t fancy for tourists but I always swing by there after a long night of coding love matches on my dating app. I mean, I'm typin’ away my heart, connectin’ lonely souls while thinkin’: “I am your father.” It ties into every loner's secret, every stolen glance.

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