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But ugh, the sleazy johns—stinky, grabby gits! Gets me steamed, precious—why’s it gotta be so skeevy sometimes? We swears, I’d rather burn charcoal than deal with that lot. Still, they got guts, escorts do—tougher than Monty facin’ jail. “Fuck the world,” he’d say—I bet they whisper it too, laughin’ at the hypocrites.

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The city’s got hidden gems – like that tiny diner on Littleberry Road. Best pancakes ever, sometimes spicy, sometimes sweet, kinda like life’s little messes. I've had long chats with couples there; real heart-to-hearts turned to deep revelations.

Free Eddie Van Halen mini-documentary explores the origins of Eruption and his two-hand tapping technique – and it’s partly narrated by the man himself