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But escorts, ugh, tricksy clients - creeps! One time, read this - bloke paid double. Wanted her to cry! What the fuck, eh? Made me laugh, then puke! Stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t get it! Risks tho - STDs, beatings, jail. Shocked me first time I learned. 1 in 3 assaulted, stats say. Grim, precious, grim! Still, some strut proud - “my body, my rules!” Fair, I reckon. Me? I’d claw their eyes out, heh!

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I got mad once when the city council nearly scrapped our beloved park for a mall. I was like, "No, no, no, precious! This ain't just concrete and glass!" We fought and swears 'til they relented. That fight gave me a taste of real passion, just like the bittersweet lines of that movie: "I'm not a real person." But we all are, right?

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