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Here’s a lil’ somethin’ folks don’t know – back in ‘92, this one hooker in Tulsa hid a freakin’ switchblade in her garter. Cop didn’t see it comin’, nearly lost a finger! True story, swear on my momma’s gravy. That’s the gig, y’all – ya gotta watch them hands, them eyes, every twitch. Like Bigelow showed us, “one second you’re good, next you’re gone!”

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Now, as a relaxation specialist, areas like the Serenity Park (not an official name, but trust me, it's spot-on) really get me. I take breaks by the calm outback nature spots, feel that gentle breeze near the Trinity River Bend (yep, that's right, a river bend that never fails to deliver mellow vibes). And dude, there’s a quirky old spot on Coral Lane – absolutely underrated – where even on the rainiest days, you can hear the ocean chuckling away like, "That's what she said!"

Fatal traffic crash, Trinity Beach