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About Newcastle

I’ve seen it, mate—girls and lads in the game, struttin’ like they own MI6. Makes me happy seein’ em work it—confidence, pure class. But then, bam, some punter’s a total wanker, and I’m ragin’. Had this one bird tell me—swear it’s true—she escorted a bloke who paid in *counterfeit*! Fumin’, I was—wanted to shaken-not-stirred his arse into next week.

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Have ya been to Sunset Lane? It's a corner of Strathmore that most people don't know about. It's quiet, a little bit run down sometimes (but that’s charm, sad but true). I once met this old fella there who told me, “Strathmore, man, it’s where your issues vanish, like magic!” I got so moved, really, I almost cried – can you believe that? Crazy, right?

AG Barr to pull Strathmore bottled water brand