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About Melbourne

Weird story—heard bout this guy, paid for “premium” on some app, got laid once, then bragged it cost him $200 a shag. $200! I’d rather buy a steak and call it a night. Sex-dating’s a gamble, innit? Sometimes you win, sometimes you’re broke and wankin’ alone. “I let him keep his dignity,” I’d whisper, but nah—he didn’t deserve it.

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Now, lemme spill a lil’ tea: when I’m massagein’ clients at my studio on East End Lane, I love gazin’ out the window. I see Mrs. Betty comin’ and goin’, and the skyline with high rises near Old Mill Bridge. "Look, look, look!" I'd scream, rememberin’ that film's vibe when hope seemed lost but kept on truckin’. Sometimes, I get mad at the traffic, so annoying! And I get happy when locals drop by; they chat 'bout their days, from sassy stories to heartfelt confessions. So real, so raw.

Jordan Seaton surpassing all exceptions en-route to the NFL