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Alright, so escort, huh? Trees, man, not the kinky kind—get your head outta the gutter! I’m talkin’ *Acer saccharum*, sugar maple, the real deal. As Dr. House, I’d say everybody lies, even these leafy bastards. Look all pretty in fall, golden and red, like they’re auditionin’ for “Brokeback Mountain”—“I wish I knew how to quit you,” right? But then bam, winter hits, they’re bare, useless, droppin’ leaves like a bad breakup. Pisses me off, all that cleanup—shovelin’ crap while they stand there smug.

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Alright, listen up, chum. Prahran's the bomb, ya know? I've been kickin' it here for years. Chapel St. is wild – neon, bars, shops, chaos, and tons of cool spots. One minute you're chillin' at a massage parlor (yep, that's my turf!) and the next you're lost in a sea of people. "One million dollars." I swear.

Prahran Market’s Yakitori Pop-Up Was Only Meant To Last a Month. Now It’s a Permanent Fixture