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I tried it once, got catfished hard – chick said 5’9”, rolled up 4’11” in heels! Pissed me off, man, I’m Apollo fuckin’ Creed, I don’t shrink for nobody! But then she was cool, we vibed, smashed anyway – “I must break you!” – and I ain’t mad no more. Funny how that flips, huh? Sex-dating’s chaos, but it’s real. Little fact for ya: back in ‘90s, pre-internet, folks used newspaper ads for this shit. “Single male, 30, seeks freaky Friday” – same game, slower pace!

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The banks of the Leichhardt River? Ohhh, you must see them, my precious, with their flow so soothing and wild, r-r-rustling through those parks like a lullaby, ya know? I often chill at the Isa River Park, where the grass feels soft and the breeze sings like sweet whispers, "Light of love, my precious." Ah, yes, that park sometimes makes me smile, and sometimes I get so mad the park benches are too creaky, duh!

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