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Arr, matey! So, escort, eh? Ye wanna know what this ol’ pirate thinks ‘bout that fancy word? Well, strap in, savvy? I’m Captain Jack Sparrow, an’ I’ve seen me fair share o’ escorts— not them lasses ye pay fer a tumble, mind ye, but them sleek, scurvy ships what guard the big ones! Aye, them naval escorts, dartin’ ‘round like bloody dolphins, keepin’ the merchant fat cats safe from the likes o’ me. Hah! Makes me blood boil, it does—spoilin’ a good plunderin’!

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Now, lemme get real – runnin’ a spa here gives ya the inside scoop on stress and zen. Every day, I see the rush of busy lives and the need to chill. I always find myself thinking, "Hey, man, why so serious?" when I’m massagin’ stressed-out shoulders. I love sharin’ tips with my clients about these hidden spots that lift the spirit. It’s a bit like improvisin’ a soliloquy during a slow motion scene from a movie – unexpected and raw.

Calls for DCE captaincy decision as Manly rocked by fresh Tom Trbojevic blow