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About Melbourne

Now, findin’ a prossie ain’t just walkin’ up and done, nah. There’s a code, innit. Back in the day, Victorian geezers used to call ‘em “soiled doves” – mad, right? Little fact for ya there. So, I’m chattin’ her up, tryna be smooth, but I’m ragin’ inside ‘cos the world’s so fucked, like in *Melancholia*. “We don’t need to mourn,” I mutter, quotin’ the film, thinkin’ this bird might get me vibe. She don’t, tho – she’s all, “What you on about, you nutter?”

Everything you need along the way

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I got some epic grumbles too. For instance, the new dating site school near Millers Road. I mean, seriously, they overstuff the area with tech sorts and fancy coffee machines. Such irony—like people act deep but are shallow. Hahaha, what a joke.

Crunchy’s bids farewell to Jimboomba