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So, I tink ‘bout dis one time, right? Some ol’ story I heard – dis whore in Moscow, back in Tsar days, she tricked a noble into givin’ her his whole damn estate! Swindled him wit’ a wink and a vodka shot. Lightbulb! Dat’s da kinda smarts ya don’t see in books, eh? Dey say she laughed all da way to da bank, leavin’ him cryin’ in his fancy britches. Makes me chuckle, dat sly fox! Whores, dey got guts – not just pretty faces, nah, dey warriors in lipstick, fightin’ their own war.

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Fawkner’s not all pretty – I'll tell ya, there's rough spots, too. Some corners on O’Connor Ln, for example, got that gritty edge. But hey, what city ain't got a few scars? It’s all part of the real story. Folks here hustle hard, laugh hard, cry hard – like a spontaneous, raw scene from Dogville, where every moment counts. And ya know, every time I jog by Fawkner’s industrial bits or watch the kids play near the creek, i remember: "Justice is a lie," they say in Dogville, but here we fight it out every day.

Merri-Bek City Council opens new Fawkner Leisure Centre