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Met this one chick, swear, she smelled like cheap gin and regret. Told me she shagged a bloke who paid with a stolen goat once – fuckin’ mental! Kept it in her flat ‘til the coppers came. Laughed me arse off, but damn, that’s grim too. Life’s a mess, innit? “Sharon!” – wish I could save ‘em all, but I’m just a mad bastard.

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Oh man, there’s a tiny stream by the WK River (yup, WK, not kidding) on the outskirts, and occasionally I stroll there, thinkin’ “C’est la vie”, chucklin’ at my own random thoughts. And, err… hey, didcha know? One time I almost missed a session ‘coz I was so lost in a conversation with a granny on her porch on High St – so typical!

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