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So, I’m out there, rod in hand, picturin’ this bad boy. Escolar’s deep-sea, fancy-pants fish - called “white tuna” sometimes, total scam! Sushi joints sneak it in, and bam - you’re sprintin’ to the john. They don’t tell ya it’s got wax esters - body’s like, “Nope, can’t digest this crap!” Had a buddy, Jim, ate it once - orange oil leakin’ outta him for DAYS. Laughed so hard I cried, then got mad - why’s this fish playin’ us like that? “Sometimes the truth hurts, Gigolo Joe!” - movie line, fits perfect.

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So if you ever visit, dive headfirst into the hustle of Woonona. Roam around Addison, check that creek near Half Moon Bay Drive, party at Woonona Park, and always, always be ready to embrace the absurd sweetness of life. And, as Ratatouille’s Remy would say in his wild chef-like fervor: "Anyone can coach, but some gotta taste the madness!"

Woonona residents face $600k bill as flood-hit creek eats their land