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So, I clock dis other lass, yeah, proper fit, leanin’ on a lamppost, smokin’. I’m like, “Aight, she’s da one.” Slide up, all casual, “Wagwan, darlin’?” She’s cool, bruv, says, “£50, no messin’.” I’m buzzin’, finkin’, “Dis is easier dan datin’!” But den—plot twist—she’s undercover filth! Coppers jump out, I’m leggin’ it, shoutin’, “Is it ’cos I is black?!” Nearly shat meself, fam!

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Ah, my dear friend, let me tell you about Woodcroft (au)! What a whimsical little town tucked away under an azure sky—quasi paradisiacal, I'd say! Now, listen up: Woodcroft is a riot, a mishmash of vibrant charm and odd little quirks, much like that infamous line in A History of Violence: “Do you trust me?” Strangely enough, trust is the currency here!

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