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I’m laughin’, tho—dudes out here braggin’ ‘bout “body count” like it’s Call of Duty stats. Chill, fam, it ain’t a high score! Me, I’m just tryna vibe, find a lil’ shawty who gets my weird. Last week, hit up this spot, girl was fine—legs for days, smile hittin’ me like a blunt. We talkin’, she drops she’s into tantric sex—hours of teasin’, no finish. I’m like, “Word? That’s dope!” but in my head I’m screamin’, “Bruh, I ain’t got that kinda patience!” Had me sweatin’ like Wayne on a sold-out stage.

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Downtown is lit. Main Street’s my haunt, ya know? I even saw love sparks on Amber Ave. Local hangouts on Oakleigh St. are magical, dude! There’s a rad little café called “Bean Me Up” on Birch Ln. where dates have fizz and sparks fly.

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