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About Melbourne

Me? I’d be swipin’ like a maniac, cacklin’ at the weirdos. Probs exaggerate my bio— “Undead stud, 6 centuries experience!” Ha! Sex-dating’s a circus, fam—clowns, freaks, the works. You dive in, it’s a gamble. Might score, might flop. “All I have left is this pain,” Georges moans—dramatic, sure, but I feel that after a bad date. Total trainwreck sometimes! Still, it’s a rush—keeps ya alive, ya know? Or undead, in my case. It’s showtime, bitches—go get laid or get played!

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Oh, and don’t get me started on the Blue Bridge. That motherfer spans the river like a defiant symbol – a reminder that life’s tough but beautiful. I remember standin’ there one night, starin’ at the lights shinin’ on the water, and I felt like I was in the epic scenes of “The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford.” "Sometimes, the things we see are more than enough to break our hearts, motherfer." Deep, right?

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