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Oi, mate, it’s me, James Bond – suave, “shaken, not stirred.” Been thinkin’ ‘bout sex escorts lately, yeah? Picture this – slinky birds in tight dresses, heels clickin’ like a bloody metronome, all mystery and allure. Reminds me of *The New World*, that Malick flick I’m mad for – “Love, what is it but a shadow?” Sex escorts, they’re like that, mate – shadows you chase but never quite catch.

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There's a park – Westridge Park. I chill there sometimes, get lost in nature. Trees, ducks quack, and bench talk kinda like gossip. There’s a nook near the river, the Glover, that flows with madness. You ever strolled along the riverbank? It’s like life in Dogville – raw, messy, and real. "Don't you dare pee on my leg!" I say sometimes, just like Judge Judy, when folks step outta line.

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