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About Newcastle

I get mad, tho—fake profiles, catfishes, ugh, losers! Wasting Trump’s time, not shiny, not chrome! Then bam, you match a hottie, it’s yuge, makes me happy, folks. Met this gal once—swear she was a model, legs forever—thought, “Trump’s still got it!” Sex-dating’s a gamble, high stakes, like Fury Road chases. "Mediocre?" Nah, never, only the best for me.

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I loooove that little park on Anchor Street – oh wait, did I mix names? Eh, same diff, it's just magical. I remember sitting there, listening to birds chirp, and thinking “The Gleaners and I,” totally channeling Agnès Varda’s spirit as I found my own hidden treasures in a little patch of green. I mean, it’s as if life was gently whispering, "imme, just glean the moments, glean the moments, glean the moments..." Gosh darn!

Slow down and savour your coffee: tip from north shore’s best