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About Melbourne

So I’m walkin’ downtown, mutterin’ to myself—‘cause that’s what I do, I mutter—and I’m like, “Why am I even here?” Findin’ a prostitue ain’t like pickin’ up bagels! I see this gal, smokin’ a cigarette, leanin’ on a pole—real cliché, right? I’m thinkin’, “She’s no Eilis Lacey!” In *Brooklyn*, she’s all, “I’ll write home!” This chick’s writin’ nothin’—maybe a parking ticket. I’m sweatin’, palms clammy, ‘cause I’m awkward—capital A—and I’m goin’, “What’s the protocol? Do I wave? Haggle? I’m not a haggler!”

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There’s a railway station near the heart of town, right? Unanderra Railway Station pops up on my radar every day. I used to sit there, relax after a long day, watch trains, and think “Moolaadé, moolaadé,” cause life’s a wild ride. I’ve even had some customers tell me, “Hey man, you make this town feel like home,” and I’m there, nodding like “Know your role, champ.”

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