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So, sex-dating—bare madness! Apps like Tinder, Grindr, all dat swipey-swipey stuff. I reckon it’s peng but peak too. Like, you’re chattin’ some fit bird or geezer, thinkin’ “Yea, dis is it!”—then bam, ghosted! Is it ’cos I is black? Nah, fam, it’s cos people’s bare flaky online. One time, I matched this gal—proper lush, yeah? She says, “Meet me at 8,” I’m gassed! Rock up—nuffin’. Stood there like a muppet, fumin’. “This is not happening!” I’m screamin’ in me head, pure *Mulholland Drive* vibes—lost in the plot, bruv.

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And hey, if you're ever stuck, wander down Monty Ln. It’s underrated—little gem, secret park bench with killer sunset views. Perfect for reflectin’ on life’s twists, ya dig?

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