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About Wollongong

Oi, precious, me’s Gollum, yesss, split-mind hissing! Sex-dating, eh? Nasty, tricksy thing it is! Swiping left, right, like chasing shadows. Me likes it, me hates it—arghh! Reminds me of *The Great Beauty*, y’know? “What’s beyond is a lie,” Jep says. Sex-dating’s like that—shiny, empty promises. Profiles all dolled up, pics fake as hobbits’ gold! Met this lass once, said she’s 25—lies! More like 40, wrinkles deep as Mordor’s pits. Made me mad, precious, mad as a warg!

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Best Massage in Wentworthville New South Wales - 22 Parramatta Massage, Coco Massage shop, Amanda's Thai Therapy, Parramatta Blossom Massage.

The local park, Chillax Gardens – oh my gosh, it’s a hidden gem – has these winding paths near the gushing Little Rivulet (I swear it's like a secret movie scene in Holy Motors, baby: “Oh, I must say, this is simply marvelous!”). And then there's the old brick bridge on Stoney Lane – a perfect spot to clear your head after a long day of kneading out knots. Goshdarnit, I always say that sometimes a good lickin' of nature’s charm does more than a deep tissue massage!

‘Targeted attack:’ Gangster shot dead outside beauty clinic