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Like, literally, escort in sports? Wild! So I’m totes a sports psychologist now, right? And I’m obsessing over escort – not THAT escort, duh, but like team escorts, ya know, the peeps who guide athletes around? I saw this one time, at a game, this escort chick was, like, SO extra. She’s yelling at some poor dude who got lost – “This isn’t Rome, babes!” – and I’m like, dying laughing. Reminds me of *The Great Beauty*, that vibe of chaos, y’know? “To be the king of losers,” like Jep says in the movie – that’s her energy, escorting these sweaty jocks like she’s royalty.

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So, get ready, ya dummy friend, for a wild ride through Sandringham! It's messy, it's beautiful, it's surreal – like a twisted fairy tale that keeps on giving. I'm telling ya, if you come over, you'll see the side no tourist guide ever shows. And always remember – in this city, dreams and nightmares are just two sides of the same coin, man! Respect my authoritah, and peace out!

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