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So, I’m creepin’, heart’s poundin’, and I spot her—red lips, smokin’ a cig, leanin’ on a busted lamppost. “Come what may,” I mutter, like I’m Christian swoonin’ over Satine. I stroll up, all cool, like, “Yo, lady, need a shelf built?” She laughs—LAUGHS!—and I’m like, “Score!” Happy as hell, dude, ‘cause she didn’t ditch me. Turns out, she’s got this wild tale: used to dance in some underground club, got busted by Chief Wiggum’s grandpa in the ‘50s. Freaky, right?

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I get riled too, man, when traffic on Riverside Rd sucks me in a neverending loop—ugh, fair dinkum, it's infuriatin sometimes! And sometimes, I drop by the local dive bar on Merrick St, where someone always shouts out, “You merely adopted the dark, now embrace the light!” as if quoting some cult dismantling enlightenment.

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