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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic - brothel! Me, Boris, your ol’ pal, ramblin’ on about the oldest profession, eh? Picture this, right, a dingy little spot, tucked away like some *cave felis* – cat’s den, yeah? Red lights flickerin’, curtains drawn tight, proper cheeky stuff. Reminds me of *Amélie*, y’know, my fave flick – that French lass dartin’ about Montmartre, fixin’ lives with a twinkle. Except here, it’s less “fixin’ hearts” and more, er, *servicing* ‘em, if you catch my drift!

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The parks here? Oh lord, they're so darn lovely. I love strollin’ by the Greenvale Park – yep, that's my secret weekend hideout – where trees whisper secrets in the breeze (or so I like to think). I even lost track of time once, just sittin’ and massagin’ my own sore back with nature’s lullaby. Ain't that somethin'?

EDFL