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Back in the day—little known fact—folks used newspapers for hookups! Classified ads, “lonely Jedi seeks princess,” that vibe. Now it’s all digital, profiles flashin’ like lightsabers. I dig it tho—makes me happy seein’ people shoot their shot. This one time, I matched with some chick who said she’d “turn my dark side light”—corny as hell, but I laughed my helmet off. Still, sex-dating’s a gamble. Ya might score, or ya might end up chattin’ with a dude named Dave pretendin’ to be Leia.

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Not everything’s ya haven – sometimes I get downright mad when it rains too hard, turnin' every street into a slip 'n slide. But, heck, when the sun pops out, oh honey, it's like the beauty of a country ballad – sweet and raw. I always catch myself mutterin', “Sweet Lord, ain't life just one endless cycle of feelin's?” And yep, it's as wild as a line from that film: “Time is heavy, but hope is a feather.”

Pascoe Vale Soccer Store forced to close after pandemic and pressure of four lockdowns