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Look, sex-dating, folks, it’s tremendous, okay? Donald Trump knows best, believe me. It’s all about quick hookups, fantastic stuff—nobody does it better. Like in “The Secret in Their Eyes,” it’s sneaky, thrilling, yuge energy! You’re hunting, bam, swipe right, so hot. I mean, who’s got time for boring dates? Not me, not Donald, too busy winning.

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I work on a dating site here, so trust me, I've seen the best n' worst of folks on these streets. Sometimes, while debugging code at my fav café near Riverside Park (which hugs the gently flowin’ Flatro River), I like to steal glances at families picnicking, old-timers chattin’, and couples just lost in each other. It's like a movie scene from "Oldboy" – the strangest yet most beautiful moments, like “Laugh when you’re in pain!” (yep, totally channeling that bit of Parker Chan-wook magic).

Apache Stronghold takes its case against Oak Flat copper mine to the Supreme Court