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Me, I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ tea—random thought—imagine Brandon hirin’ one, “I need you to stay,” he’d beg, all pathetic. Escorts prolly hear that shit daily. Makes me laugh, picturin’ ‘em rollin’ eyes, “Mate, it’s extra for cuddles.” Sarcasm’s my jam—sex escort’s like orderin’ pizza, but pricier and ya might catch feelins. Dr. Evil voice, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,”—that’s what I’d charge to deal with clingy bastards.

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My fave spot? Definitely The Old Mill on Creek Road. It’s kinda hidden, but man, its history makes my heart swell. I've had loads of insightful convos with clients there. And sometimes, I swear—like in that flick Her—I feel like the city whispers to me, "I'm here, a part of you." So poetic, right? I luv that!

‘Woke mumbo jumbo’: Sydney barrister says he will lobby King of Tonga in fight against Newington College coed shift