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Lemme tell ya, escort ain’t just some dude in a vest. Nah, it’s a whole damn opera! Picture this: convoys screamin’ down highways, escort up front, blockin’ traffic like a freakin’ boss. Once saw this escort guy—total nutjob—wavin’ a flag like he’s directin’ a circus. Made me laugh ‘til I choked! “Introduce a little anarchy,” I thought—nah, he’s too good at this gig. Kept my shipment of steel beams tight, no smash-ups. Happy as a clown with a crowbar, me.

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I remember this one time, right, I was closing up, feelin’ all zen after a hectic night—boom, my buddy from the block shouts, “You ever seen a ghost dance on King Street?” I nearly dropped my oils. Murrumba’s got these secrets, hidden like absurd as a movie director’s final cut! And yeah, ya might laugh at how my fingers turned into story-tellers from all those massages—each knot whispered a tale of this city’s mad love and rage.

Timeline: How gunpoint carjacking, fatal crash unfolded