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About Perth

I love it tho, flaws and all. It’s raw, untamed, a lil dangerous—like me after too many margaritas. Escort’s not some posh, groomed trail; it’s a hot mess, and I’m here for it. “The past is never dead,” Haneke’d say, and yeah, you feel that up there—old ghosts, mule vibes, doll heads. Next time, I’m haulin’ you up with me, buddy. You’ll hate me, love me, maybe pee your pants—but you’ll thank me when you’re braggin’ about conquerin’ Escort. Now, where’s my damn coffee?

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Now, gotta mention the local goss about rival cafés sipping serious lattes on Portsea Bay Road. Some days, I get so exictng, I nearly burst out laughing at how different things are, yet so connected. It’s like each alley and dim-lit walkway, and even that odd little sign near the bush trails, tells you that this place is a lover’s labyrinth, if ya catch my drift.

EPA inspects discoloured water in Mt Martha