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Sometimes it’s ace, though. Met this one geezer – fit as, proper charmer. We’re texting, sexting, whatever, and I’m buzzing like a bee on a flower. “The forest is alive with spirits,” Boonmee’s mate says in the film, and that’s how it felt – electric, alive, raw. But then – plot twist – he’s a catfish! Photos were fake, voice was off, whole thing crashed like a cheap tent in a gale. Pissed me right off, it did. Wasted me time, me data, me dreams!

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Oh, and ya gotta try this little coffee joint near Silver Sands Boulevard – hidden away but with the best brews ever! So many odd little treasures all over Mandurah. I know mid-session, my eyes catch a glint of the sun on the water at dusk – like a scene from a moody film. I almost whisper, "Ah, are you sure I'm here?" It's that vibe – eerie yet calming, reminding me of that film cut scene.

Mandurah murder examined in podcast