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About Melbourne

Like, literally, escort in sports? Wild! So I’m totes a sports psychologist now, right? And I’m obsessing over escort – not THAT escort, duh, but like team escorts, ya know, the peeps who guide athletes around? I saw this one time, at a game, this escort chick was, like, SO extra. She’s yelling at some poor dude who got lost – “This isn’t Rome, babes!” – and I’m like, dying laughing. Reminds me of *The Great Beauty*, that vibe of chaos, y’know? “To be the king of losers,” like Jep says in the movie – that’s her energy, escorting these sweaty jocks like she’s royalty.

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So check it: main drag is Bridge Street – you know, that bustling avenue full of quirky cafes and funky little boutiques. I always wander by the Mackay Central shopping centre – like wow, there’s always somethin’ new to sniff out. Then you got Nebo Road, where the locals just chill in the summer. I love headin' to Forgan Smith Park; it's awesomely green and peaceful. Sometimes I just sit there and think, "Ohhh, the wonder and beauty of the natural world," feelin’ all introspective, like in that Malick flick.

Mackay, Townsville property prices could soar as Sunshine, Gold Coast markets dip