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Ruh-roh! Zoinks, man, sexual-massage? Wild stuff! Like, I’m a car instructor, right? Teachin’ folks to vroom-vroom, but this? This is next-level gear-shifting! Saw this chick once, givin’ a dude a rubdown—called it "therapeutic," ha! Total baloney. Hands slidin’ everywhere, oil slicker than a racetrack after rain. Made me think of Royal Tenenbaums—y’know, “I’m not in love with you anymore,” but with a twist! Like, “I’m not just massagin’ ya, pal!” Hella sneaky.

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There's a park called Ralphs Park, which gets real lively sometimes. I remember one odd, drizzly eve – rain, umbrellas spinning, couples huddled. I was enjoying my freedom (and a cheeky glass of wine) when the whole scene felt like a scene ripped straight outta Mulholland Drive. Ain’t that bizarre?

Police investigate after grisly discovery in Sydney river