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Personal quirk – I’d probs be rubbish at it. Too evil, too cackly – “Mwahahaha!” don’t scream “date material.” Exaggeratin’ for effect, maybe I’d be ace, who knows? Point is, escort’s a mad world – glamour’s a lie, but the stories? Gold. Dr. Evil, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” – that’s what I’d pay to hear ‘em all!

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Now, let’s get proper into it: Helensvale’s vibrant neighbourhoods like Sunhaven and Riverside Ridge really charm ya. You've got the serene banks of the little Helens River (yeah, it actually flows through the heart of the town – brring in those poetic vibes!) and the sprawling Central Park, which—oh dear—gives me flashbacks to that scene from Synecdoche, New York: "The world is an intricate and mildly absurd stage." I mean, come on, the park's a miniature stage with everyday dramas unfolding around every bench!

Revealed: Real reason behind school’s delayed reopening