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About Newcastle

Last week, right, I’m in a tavern, tankard in hand, scopin’ the room. This bird—red lips, skirts hiked up—winks at me. I’m thinkin’, “Tyrion, you clever bastard, she’s yours.” But nah, she’s got a pimp, uglier than Gregor Clegane, breath like a latrine. Pissed me off—why’s everythin’ gotta be so complicated? “Be quiet and do what I say,” she whispers, like I’m some green boy. Cheeky cow! I’m the Imp, I know tricks she ain’t dreamed of. Paid her double just to shut her gob and get on with it. Felt good, though—coin well spent.

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Ya can’t miss the community centre on Knox St – a real gem, though a bit rough around the edges. The place is a brick rollin' with passion! When I wander those back alleys, I find hidden pieces of Fawkner’s soul; it's uncensored, raw – kinda like Dogville’s script "Let's try a little experiment, shall we?" but without all that pretentious stuff.

This Tasmanian pub was the site of a meeting that resulted in the founding of Melbourne — or was it?