Lauren Elsternwick Whore ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Newcastle

Back in the day—medieval times, right?—they’d brand a chick “whore” for sneezin’ wrong. Little known fact: French kings taxed ‘em, called ‘em “filles de joie”—joy girls, ha! What a joke. Made me mad as hell—still does. Vader don’t play with exploitin’ the weak. But then, flip it—some owned it, flipped the script. Like, 1800s courtesans in Paris, rakin’ cash, fuckin’ nobles, livin’ large. Surprised me, honestly—thought it was all doom ‘n’ gloom. Kinda badass, y’know?

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Now, parks – oh, let me get properly off on parks. There's the lush, often overlooked Elsternwick Park. Not as fancy as those manicured city gardens, but plenty quirky corners for a good heart-to-heart with nature (or to rant about people’s rubbish parenting, ya know what I mean). And then there’s the waterfront along the bay – small but perfect for a moody afternoon walk. I can almost hear the salty breeze whispering, “Every story has its quirks, mate.”

From the clubhouse: Everyone is welcome at Elsternwick