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So, sex-dating – far out, man! It’s like the ’60s, free love, but with apps. Tinder, Bumble, all that jazz. Folks ain’t waitin’ for flowers no more – nah, they’re like, “Smashing, let’s shag!” I dig it, makes me happy, real mojo boost. But sometimes, ugh, it’s a drag – creeps ghostin’ ya, or catfish with fake pics. Pisses me off, man! Once saw a bloke say he’s 6’5”, turns up 5’2” – what a bummer, yeah?

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Sometimes I get mad ‘bout the noise at Central Street – cars, random dog barks, and noisy night owls. Ugh, it drives me nuts when I’m tryin’ to center my mind for a massage. I like my silence almost as much as a good, deep tissue release. In those moments, I wish I could plug in some of Edward Yang’s dialogues – “The world’s as simple as it is beautiful… and as confusing as it is.”

Cheese doesn't please crook on a meat-loving roll with his smorgasbord of crimes