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So, I’m picturin’ this—me, Larry David, needin’ an escort. Not like that, get your mind outta the gutter! I mean, like, someone to drag me through life ‘cause I’m losin’ it daily. But okay, let’s talk real escort—hired company, right? I’m fascinated, honestly. Didja know escorts go back forever? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em—called ‘em “hetaerae” or some crap. Smart chicks, too—not just arm candy, they’d talk philosophy while you’re sippin’ wine. Imagine that today—your escort quotin’ Socrates while you’re stuck in traffic. I’d lose my mind! “Hey, honey, less Plato, more speed!”

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I might be a bit odd, a chill relaxation specialist, but Cobram's little quirks get me hyped. My fave spot? Honestly, it's the secret pathway near Sunset Bend Park. It’s like stepping into a mystical realm with each step. Birds chirp like epic quotes, and my soul feels lighter, as if echoing, “A warrior's strength flows through nature.”

See why Cobram and Barooga has landed in the top ten across the state this Easter